that have become ingrained in the lingo of our culture. Two very contrasting roles (and lines) come to mind immediately."You can't handle the truth!" as Colonel Jessep in A Few Good Men
"You make me want to be a better man." as Melvin Udall in As Good As It Gets
Both of these lines, from characters that are polar opposites, speak to an issue I see at play in my sanctification and that of many sisters in Christ. First, we want to be better people. We want to be more sensitive wives, mothers, sisters, and friends. We want to be more like Christ and less like the world. But the weight that holds us back many times is that WE CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH. We easily recognize this problem in others, but how often do we recognize it enough in ourselves to overcome it? You have to REALLY want to be a better woman before you can hear and handle the truth when it comes to changing.
My husband and I go through this over and over again. I really do want to know the aspects of my personality and conversation that annoy others and put them off. But if he ever lets me know I said or did something, I get my "feelings hurt". If we've worked through this once, we've worked through it a thousand times. His response is "but don't you want me to tell you?" And I do!! I don't want to be a woman who can't handle the truth.
Here is why the truth hurts:
1) It is humbling.
2) It is humbling.
3) It is humbling.
:-) The bottom line is that I don't like to be humbled. I hate to admit that I got something wrong or offended someone. I'm embarassed. Embarassment and defensiveness are the ugly stepsisters of pride. And they are both really inconsistent with the gospel. I need to know who I am in Christ (which is a sinner desperately in need of God's salvation and utterly dependent on Christ for any good). Then the exposure of my faults can be seen for it's true God-centered purposes. It humbles me, causes me to acknowledge my faults, and drives me back to Jesus to help me change.
Phil. 2:3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves.
2 comments:
Thanks for your honesty in this post- it is another one to which I can totally relate. I’m sad to say that it constantly surprises me how quickly my heart defaults to pride and resistance toward my husband’s loving correction of my sin. I am only beginning to see this ugly quality in me, and I am sure that what I see now is only the tip of the iceberg of what lurks in my heart. My only hope is Phil 1:6-that He who met me with grace and power at my conversion, and who has patiently grown me ever since, will continue to empower me to change by His amazing grace!
I also thank you for your transparency of pride. I had an experience a few weeks ago where I made a mistake in a public setting (i.e. in front of a lot of people) in my job. And when others pointed it out, I was sure their motives were hostile (and some were). But I was wrong, and I had to admit and correct it in this public setting.
I was embarrassed and so HUMBLED! God completely used that situation to humble my pride in my job. While it was painful to live through, I am so thankful that God loves me enough to correct me - even in such circumstances. I am now approaching my job with a much more humble spirit.
I am going through a season where God is striping away so many of things I've been "sure" about. This situation at work just being the latest. It is painful to be humbled - to admit your faults; you are so correct that our hearts must really want to change! My only hope for change is through Him.
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